For several years with a stalker.I will not get hurt anymore, says Vlastina Svátková<

“I decided not to worry, to let it go and to take every step to prevent her from doing this to anyone else,” said the actress in an interview that took place during the filming of the TV show Seznam Moje lýsta.

Vlastina Svátková, whose film career began 15 years ago with a small role in the Bond film Casino Royale, has suffered from bulimia and domestic violence in the past. When she later wrote a book about her problems, it was unsuccessful in publishing. So she sold the car so she could marry it herself. And it became a bestseller.

"I'm already proud of myself, I couldn't do that before. And despite my own mistakes, I learned not to make mistakes," says actress Vlastina Svátková in an unusually open confession. (The author of the interview and Vlastina Svátková touched each other during the filming, editor's note)

Are you confident?

I think it has improved a lot. To me, self-confidence has always evoked being conceited or egotistical, which is a misconception. I think I am self-aware, self-respecting and proud of myself. And it wasn't like that a long time ago.

Right now. I'm asking because you come from a family that didn't boast much. After your boyfriend told you you had a big butt, you suffered from bulimia. Then you went through domestic violence. And suddenly you self-published the book Space for the Soul, you even sold your car because of it. Where did it come from in you that you believed that you would not come to the drum?

I couldn't believe it. It was perhaps just that kind of life decision when you don't really know what will happen. You know you're taking a big risk, and despite it all, you decide to do it and take responsibility for it. With faith that it will turn out well, even if many people discourage you. You probably know that I first attended a meeting at a large publishing house. And there they told me that the book would not be sold, that they would not publish it and that they would sell a maximum of a thousand copies. With this information, I had to decide the next day how many books to print myself.

How much did you decide on?

At first I wanted eight thousand, based on this negotiation I only gave five and it was a big mistake, because then I had to have a reprint done within a month. And in the end there were twenty-five thousand of them.

So a bestseller.

So a bestseller. But if I listened back then and didn't have that faith in myself and in what I created, the book would never have been published.

You sold a lot of books thanks to social networks where you wrote about yourself. And many women respond that you help them because you are very honest and they take something for themselves through your experiences and feelings. But what does that give you? Is it a form of psychotherapy for you?

I always thought no. But it is actually possible, because if one opens up and goes to the market with skin, it risks not being accepted. But I am so connected to people that no one is alone in this, we are not the only ones who are weird, crazy or just plain stupid. It hardens a man. But I found that it was exhausting me a lot. That I can actually work for others, but I don't have to give myself completely, I don't have to share everything. Then I don't have the strength and energy for my family. Maybe that's why my family fell apart: I gave a lot to strangers, I gave away on social networks and didn't protect what I have at home. So I changed it over the last year. I had to find out what I really wanted, what path to take next, find a balance between life and work.

Unfortunately, by replying to everyone on Facebook and being very open, you also earned the attention of a stalker. She's been bothering you for a long time. how is it now

I'm not allowed to talk about it because it's already in the criminal prosecution phase. So I won't tell you the details. Just in general: When someone tells me "don't respond, she'll stop", it doesn't work. For two years I have not responded at all to her attempts to contact me, but she is just the type of person who will probably never stop. As if the only thing in her life is me, she keeps trying to get to me. So I decided not to worry, to let it go and to take every step to prevent her from doing this to anyone else. Maybe I'll be an example that we can defend ourselves. People known in the media, unknown, anyone. So that no one can take away our sense of safety and security, that we can go out with our children without someone lurking on us. And he publicly hurt on social media. Many people feel that when they create fake profiles, they can write anything. We should address this and stop it.

How did this experience change you?

Someone told me that she is my teacher. That she came to teach me to take care of myself and protect myself. I think it is. I started to be more careful and maybe stopped being so naive. A lot of people are surprised that I lived almost 40 years with my lifestyle. Because I'm very trusting, I thought that when people said something to me, they meant it. Like, for example, the construction company I hired. I opened my heart to them, praised how wonderful they were for coming to help me, and bought lovelies and brought me coffees. And my partner Honza says: “Do you know that you are paying them for this? You don't have to wear those charms.” And it turned out that when they saw how happy I was with them, they did whatever they wanted… and then I looked like a crazy person. I showed them what I thought was wrong, they refused. That cured me too. And gradually almost everything cured me, I became so tougher. It is needed when people are very empathetic and naive like me. A friend used to say to me: "You're so nice that you're stupid." I needed to start being careful and learn that I don't have to tell everyone straight out, it's exploitable.

What did two broken marriages cure you of?

Probably also from some naivety. I'll make up some idea that something will happen forever. In my old things, I dug out a piece of paper that one ex-husband had to sign for me - that he would never leave Vlastinka. We had to laugh when I found it - how splashed I was. I believed in that great true love.

You got married for the first time after a month of dating.

Right now. Those two marriages also cured me of having to jump into something quickly. I no longer have the idea from the falling in love phase that he is the man of my life, so I will immediately marry him and have a child with him. I guess I've grown up. Probably late, but I matured when I was supposed to and I'll still be that crazy Motherland. I think it's important to remain a bit of a child, but at the same time to be the grown woman. To create relationships that are mature. This means I don't have to rush anywhere. I don't have to just tie anyone to my leg. So I clarified what love actually is. Which I probably didn't know until now.

At the launch of the last book, You will find me in the dark, you talked about how you never want to beg for love. Does that mean you had to beg for her?

Well, she had to. I mean, she didn't have to, but I thought I had to. And I thought - and this was probably the low self-esteem - that when my partner got angry, I didn't know how to stay in the conflict. I didn't have the adult perspective, I felt terribly bad and somehow I reverted to the pattern of a little child begging for that love and that attention. So I went to beg us not to fight anymore, to reconcile. "Love me already and hug me." And the partner rejected me even more. So I felt even worse. It was a vicious cycle. Today I see how absurd it was. It's just the opposite: When a conflict arises, I'm the one who says: "Okay, we'll solve it tomorrow, go to sleep." I couldn't do that.

How do you raise your three sons?

I oscillate between the mother who allows everything and forgets that she gave a punishment an hour ago, and the father who sets the rules. It's easier for guys to find a loophole to exploit it. But I am simply a mother of three sons and I try to raise them with the feminine energy that cannot be replaced. I just don't have that masculine energy. Or sometimes I have, but it doesn't suit me at all. So I mainly instill in boys what a woman would need or want. Be nice to women. Don't be aggressive, don't be violent and be attentive. They help me with heavy bags, they get involved at home. It's normal that I can't do everything myself. If you need something, take it, take it, do it. I want them to be independent, not dependent on me, because dependency is simply a topic I've been dealing with all my life, and I certainly don't want any of my three sons to be in a shack with mom until they're thirty.

Wait until they start leaving!

I'm looking forward to it. Fact. I look forward to the fact that although they will leave, they will come to visit me. And I have a vision of us going out to dinner, me and my three sons. That they will invite me and we will talk about what they have experienced, how they are doing, what new women's discoveries they have. Or not women, whatever they want. But having them curled up on the couch at home and doing their dirty laundry is definitely not. So that doesn't work.

You didn't study acting, you had this special training: lecturing at funerals. How did you get there?

That was at the gym. When there were teachers who wanted to enter this and that competition, I applied to almost all of them. Because I probably had somewhere in my subconscious that I had to prove to my mom how great I was. And then one day they came from the office to see if anyone wanted to recite at funerals. So I signed up immediately. I was very tempted. And then it turned out that it had a number of advantages - it was a very interesting school of life, being close to everything that went on at funerals. I was also getting paid, it was my first money. And besides, I flunked out of school. Which reminds me that I already had the acting inclinations since elementary school, I played in various dramas, and when the teacher called me for literature at the gymnasium, I wasn't really studying... and that didn't exist to come home with an A. So I played the etude that my stomach hurts terribly and I almost died because I had four egg breads. The teacher just rolled her eyes and immediately sent me home. I thought to myself, yes, that's good, I played it well.

You come from Slovakia, from Myjava, and did you come to Prague for an internship at a magazine? Why?

I was always active. When I made up my mind that "this" would be interesting, I didn't wait for a miracle to happen and someone to notice that I was sitting in the corner. I always took steps to get there. Already in elementary school, I read a lot, went to the library, leafed through fashion magazines and thought that it would be wonderful to work there. In college, I specifically wanted Ella. I wrote to the editors-in-chief and they took me on. Even to that Ella in the end. Well, I found out that the fulfillment of my childhood dream was not so wonderful.

Why not?

Because I need action, a creative environment, to bring my ideas and visions. And no one cared about it there. It's always there: in the winter it's written about what to use so that our lips don't get chapped, in the summer about protective factors. I didn't enjoy that. I left.

Your first acting opportunity was in Bondovka Casino Royal. Have you also wanted that since childhood?

Not at all. So I didn't even take any steps. Someone approached me, I think it was Ivana Christová, because when I was at university I worked as a server in a restaurant and she used to go there. She asked me if I wanted to register with the agency, that I was pretty. I wondered if he meant me, I turned to see if someone was standing behind me. I registered, they invited me to the castings, and when they first called me that I had won and I was supposed to shoot a commercial in the Czech Republic, I couldn't believe it. Today I find it comical. Because they always asked me at the casting what theater I play in and what acting school I graduated from, I always told the truth and they fired me. So I learned to lie and I felt stupid, I can't lie. When they invited me to a casting call for some foreign film - they don't say which one, because it's all kept strictly secret - there I was honest again and said that I could speak English, I worked as a waitress at school, they wanted me to bring a tray of snacks ... and then the phone call that I won the casting for James Bond.

How did you react?

I was poisoned. Because it was supposed to be for 16 days and I couldn't imagine what I would do there. I took about 20 books and read them all there in the dressing room. Instead of hunting for contacts and taking pictures with Daniel Craig, I was holed up and reading.

So you don't even have a photo with him?

I haven't, I didn't even think of it. Outside the square, we only met in the gym, where we waved at each other. I wasn't a celebrity hunter. I still have it today. For example, when I was shooting with Gary Oldman, he took a picture of me, but I didn't take a picture of him. I find it embarrassing to bother someone.

In that Bond movie, you are the girl who brought the protagonist a poisoned drink in the casino. That was shot for 16 days - and then you're in the movie for five seconds?

And I can still be glad that they didn't cut me, like many of my colleagues. That's it. Americans can afford it. When shooting big shots, they don't know when they're going to need you, so you sit there until all the pictures are shot. Because in addition to your scene, they might decide that you should flash somewhere in the back.

At one time you acted a lot in films, now less. Is that the intention?

Now I have finished one film and a series, and another big beautiful project is ahead of me. I always have it in waves. As I am also involved in writing books, jewelry and my various projects, I always need to focus on that one thing and devote myself only to it. I don't press the saw that I have to be super efficient and I have to write 20 pages of a book a day for another job. I wouldn't be able to handle that and I was still depressed that I couldn't do it. So I try to listen to myself. And I let it flow.

Did you start designing jewelry, clothes, a diary, and fragrances because you couldn't find the right one for you among what's out there?

I don't even look for it anymore, because I found that I have a clear idea of ​​what I want. Simple things and colorful creative clothes. I found a way to create it myself and if someone likes it, I'm happy. But I don't call it merchandising, there isn't even a photo of me anywhere. I create objects, put energy into them and create something that I like in its simplicity, commonness, purity. It doesn't scream.

The jewelry that you design with your friend Zuzana Šulajová is special in that the stones are lightly worked.

Completely raw. Our Adore brand is based on the fact that they are natural raw stones set in gold. I really enjoy creating new design and combining.

Yesterday, I saw almost everything on the jewelry website saying "sold". Is this good or bad for business?

Sure, good. And Zuzka and I have learned to perceive what our clients need, we have a personal relationship with them, we create a design together. We can show what we have, no piece of jewelry is ever the same - nor can it be, because every stone is different. Today, jewelry is also made from a 3D printer. That's not my style, I like original jewelry. We have about two or three pieces "free" because men are experts at "I'm proposing tomorrow, show me something quickly".

What is special about your new fragrance?

It is a body perfume that will be worn instead of a nightgown. It contains natural ingredients, so it can be smeared really anywhere. I mixed the scent so that it was both aphrodisiac and reminiscent of the purity of the soul, perhaps memories of childhood. We prepare the same scent for a candle in a glass. When it burns down, it will make a beautiful vase or candy jar.

The interview with Vlastina Svátková took place during the filming of Television List: The show My Places and Intimate Confessions can be found in the archive of the portal www.stream.cz.