Almost every other couple is divorced - Novinky.cz<

It divorces almost every other couple

This emerged from the research of the Median agency for the project The Family Doesn't End. The study also clarified why women divorce and what is the reason for divorce for men. And who will get to his feet sooner after the divorce.

"The total divorce rate in our country is around 45 percent. This is almost like the probability of an eagle falling if you toss a coin. Not to mention the breakups of unmarried couples. If this did not happen to you, be sure to contact one of your family or friends. It concerns us all, "says Lukáš Talpa from the League of Open Men (LOM), which participates in the program to help adults and children in divorce.

The most common impulse to divorce is a specific situation, after which the couple will say that this is not the case. But more often than not, it's for women than for men. For men, infidelity, whether one's own or one's partner, was an impulse to break up much more often than for women.

Surprisingly, women perceive the change in the financial situation after the divorce as more demanding. A quarter of men said that how long after the break-up they managed to stabilize their household finances, only 15 percent of women chose the same answer.

Research has shown another peculiarity of the divorcing couple. 40 percent of divorces were looking for help to cope with the situation at least somewhere, ie with a friend or relative. Only eight percent went to a psychotherapist or relationship counselor, and only five percent of parents asked for the help of a child psychologist because of their children.

At the same time, a failed divorce that plunges children into despair and self-blame can have lifelong consequences, according to experts.

According to the study, in Prague about half of divorced couples have only one child, in the rest of the country only a third of couples, the others have two or more children. In almost half of the cases, the youngest joint descendant is three or less years old at divorce or separation.

The children blame themselves for being angry

"Parental separation takes away the most valuable thing for their children - stability and life so far. However, frightening cases of impact on children do not stem from the divorce itself, it simply belongs to life, but from how the whole situation did not manage, "explained Eva Barešová, mediator and teacher of children's support groups from the Aperio organization, to Práva.

"Children do not have the tools to deal with it. This is what support groups help with. In these circles, children talk about what they go through, how they experience it, or just listen to others. We help them orientate themselves in what is happening, and we show that their lives do not end, they will just be different, "she added.

According to her, just unventilated emotions will make the biggest mess. "Children can start urinating, they can suffer from nightmares, abdominal pain, they show aggression at school. And if it is not possible to solve it in this period, they have a hard impact in adult life as well, “Barešová lists the consequences of the unruly breakup.

"Younger school children, for example, may be afraid that if a father no longer likes his mother, he will also stop loving them. He suffers from a huge sense of guilt. Children at this age are often convinced that they are to blame for their parents' happiness. So they desperately blame themselves, for example, for not being so angry. In the case of older children, anger is often added to one or both parents for what they have caused, ”adds the mediator.

The research was conducted this spring on two representative samples of the Czech population - 300 people in Prague and 700 in the rest of the country. The samples were made by parents who experienced a divorce or separation and were raising a child together at that time. The survey was conducted for the organizations Aperio - Society for Healthy Parenting and LOM, which together implement a program of assistance for divorcing parents and their children.