No woman wants to experience a situation in which she catches her partner in the company of another woman who flirts with him. Maybe you just bounced to the toilet and the person took advantage of your absence, maybe a friend saw the flirtation and translated everything for you.
No matter how you find out about flirting, one thing is clear. The information hurt you, and most importantly, it made you uncertain. How do you set new rules for the game so that you know that a similar scenario will never happen again?
First and foremost, it's important to find out who's flirting with your partner. If it was an unknown woman your dear just met at the bar, then you don't have to make a big science out of flirting.
"If it was a mild, fun flirtation, I would leave it alone. I would even be pleased that my partner is an interesting person and attracts other women, ”says psychotherapist Aimee Hartstein.
Of course, two people are needed to flirt, so focus on your partner's behavior as well. Was he uncomfortable flirting? Did he try to indicate to the woman that he was assigned?
If your answer is yes, you can congratulate yourself. You probably live next to a great partner. But if your partner didn't mind flirting, on the contrary, he quickly tuned in to the flirting note, then you should pay attention. It is possible that similar behavior will not be repeated.
Unfortunately, it is no exception when people you know are flirting with your partner. Whether it is a friend, colleague or neighbor, in all cases it is offered that the partner ends the flirting at the outset.
"This means that if you or your partner is really uncomfortable with the behavior, they should end the conversation, or change the topic, or involve you in the conversation," offers Aimee Hartstein for Brides.
In a perfect world, a partner takes these steps himself, but the reality is that many girlfriends have to intervene. Men don't want to hurt the person or cause them any inconvenience, so they prefer to tolerate "flirting".
Some girlfriends also flirt with the idea of "telling" it to a flirting woman. According to Aimee Hartstein, however, this is an extreme solution that you should only resort to when your best friend, for example, is flirting with your partner.
"Ask the woman why she is behaving this way and remind her that your partner is assigned," says the psychotherapist.
Sometimes we tend to protect our partner and look at his behavior through pink glasses. If you have caught your partner in a playful conversation with another woman several times, then it is time to perceive the reality as it really is.
Think about whether your partner is not the initiator of the flirting scenes and focus on his behavior towards other women.
If you find that he is the one who starts flirting, tell him your point of view and the position you take. It is up to you whether you suffer similar behavior or give your relationship clear boundaries.